Soon after receiving the news of Jim’s stage 4 pancreatic diagnosis in October 2013, my mind went on to think how could I lose him so soon? It’s not fair. Yet destiny’s path had led our 25 years of marriage to this place. So I decided to do something permanent. Something I warned all six of our kids never to do. I set my mind on a tattoo. The kind that would stay with me when he was gone. Well, after sharing my thoughts with Jim he just giggled. So Christmas came, and we began to look at pictures on Pinterest during his days on chemotherapy because it amused him. By January, our wedding anniversary came along and we decided on the Infinity symbol. How perfect! But soon the treatments became too much and was not holding back the cancer, so he stopped all chemo in February 2014.
By March we thought let’s add some words or initials to our infinity symbol. So, as he began to recoup from the chemo brain, he decided on the words “Breathe, my love” because that’s how he calmed ME through my anxiety with our journey. Jim was strong, courageous, and nothing meant more to him than his family. By the end of April, he and I took a Hawaiian cruise. He always promised to take me and view that beautiful state where my favorite flower the Plumeria comes from. While on our last stop in Kauai 3 hours before our ship left its final destination a local tattoo artist helped us combine our thoughts into reality. There I took the step and had my precious tattoo done. I can still remember the grin on Jim’s face. My eyes didn’t leave him as the artist carved on my left forearm. I felt no pain. When it was completed our infinity sign was made of a plumeria lei with the words he chose for me. This was our love. Our moment in time.
After coming home from paradise, the obvious was drawing in at a faster pace. According to hospice “arrangements” needed to be made. So with the help of dear friends we began the planning along with Jim. Our lives crossed paths with At His Right Hand, a small family business from Wildomar, California that created custom wood urns. I believe they felt what Jim and I desired. They created a beautiful box of solid walnut with maple inlay. Our engraving was done by another most wonderful couple from Eagle’s Mark in Temecula, California that took our precious tattoo symbol and recreated it on top of the urn. Only this time the words are mine for him “Always, my love”.
When I began Zetz Family Pancreatic Cancer Research Foundation there could be no better reminder for me than this same symbol which would continue to guide us. So became the heart and soul logo of this company that carries the new words of “Hope, Cure” done in the purple color plumeria infinity lei to stand for Pancreatic Cancer. As my children and I move forward with raising funds to help cure this deadly disease we hope that our story stays with you when you see it.